Internet culture has been shaped by people supporting their favorite influencers and celebrities. They consume their content, support their businesses and sometimes defend them in controversy. 

Sure it’s normal to have a favorite public figure. However, the fan to figure relationship gets twisted when fans start to believe they truly know and are somehow connected to the people they are fans of. This is called a parasocial relationship.

According to the article “Parasocial Relationships” by Psychology Today, parasocial relationships are defined as  “one-sided relationships in which a person develops a strong sense of connection, intimacy, or familiarity with someone they don’t know, most often celebrities or media personalities.” People believe that they have a special bond with the people they are watching. 

To some degree, who can blame them? A lot of creators refer to their fans as family, tell them they love them and show intimate or personal moments of their lives in their content. To a person who is very online, with limited real life social interaction, this can feel like creators are extending an olive branch and creating a safe space for them. 

These relationships serve as some form of unrequited love. You feel like you love and care about this person or people but in actuality that love starts and stops in your brain. 

In the article, “Do parasocial relationships fill a loneliness gap?” by Heidi Goldman, she says, “They won’t love you back. They’re like fake food. They taste good, but they have no nutritional content and won’t meet your needs. You need to love and be loved in return to thrive’” Just because someone is a public figure and sharing parts of their life, does not mean you are entitled to interactions, information or love of any kind. 

An example of parasocial relationships in fandoms is a middle-aged woman named Simone whose social media handle is Clubchalamet. She went viral for obsessive posts regarding the actor Timothee Chalamet. At first people thought it was a joke, but as time went on it was clear that this woman was deep into a parasocial relationship. 

The media fed into it with the Wall Street Journal publishing a profile on her, award ceremonies saving seats for her at their tables when Chalamet is present and various news outlets making a joke of it. 

Some of her most famous tweets include updates on his location and when he arrives, negative commentary on his long term relationship with Kylie Jenner and his looks. By platforming people like this, it is actively encouraging and supporting people with parasocial relationships and normalizing it. Not only is this dangerous for online culture but also the celebrities that are being stalked.  

Parasocial relationships create toxic online and real life spaces for those involved. It’s important to take a step back and remember you do not know these people and they do not owe you anything. Go outside, talk to your friends and enjoy your favorite internet personalities from a healthy distance.