Part 1: Fake Friends

True Friends: Sometimes friends grow apart, but the truest friendships last forever.  (Erick Lopez | Asst. Photo Editor)

True Friends: Sometimes friends grow apart, but true friendships last forever. (Erick Lopez | Asst. Photo Editor)

Mark Howard | Opinions Editor

“Fake” – a noun, verb, or adjective defined as a thing that is not genuine, counterfeit, or a forgery.

Does this sound like some one that you may know?

The two thousand and teens just may be the years of the frauds.

It is so sad when people have to question the motives of the people closest to them and caution themselves of the people they call “friends”

True friends are so hard to find and just as hard to keep.

It seems that in a society where everyone is so desperate to succeed— friendship has become more a strategy than a sincere companionship.

Attributes such as sincerity, loyalty and authentic love have become near extinct, rare and even counterfeit.

So how do you tell a counterfeit friendship from an authentic one?

What really separates your real people from your millions of fakers?

Different people have different personalities and characteristics, so each person may enjoy or be attracted to different attributes in their friends.

But in every true friendship I believe there are five consistent qualities.

Effort – You can’t fake effort.  A real friend simply puts in the same amount of effort that you put in towards sustaining or growing the friendship.

The effort between two friends or a group of friends has to match for it to be real.

A fake friend would never invest more effort than a real friend

Loyalty – You can’t fake disloyalty.  I believe that a loyal friendship should be the only type of friendship.

People go through a lot of ups and downs in their life.

Things change, times change, and people change.

But loyalty within a friendship should never change.

Sometimes even true friends may grow apart, but If you’ve cared for a person and wanted the best for a person once you should always have those feelings for that person.

Real friends don’t change their minds about you.

And they definitely don’t change their minds the minute you are absent from their presence.

It is sad to see people talk negatively of their friends behind their back— so to speak.

The rapper Drake makes great songs with some great lyrics, or phrases, that people  may identify with.

Like the song,“No New Friends.”

A lot of people have adopted this “motto” towards friendship as their own.

But what’s sad  and obviously what’s fake, is how abusive and negative some are towards those old friends that they’ve had for years.

Disloyalty is a heart breaker but it’s definitely one of the best ways to distinguish your fake friends from you real ones.

Sincerity – You can’t fake sincerity.  Sincerity is from the heart.

A friendship at some time or another may require some type of dependency.

This is where friendships make themselves or break themselves.

Everybody needs something and sometime.

I think all friendships at some point come to this exchange.

What I think determines authentic friendship is the handle of this exchange.

Real friends are sincerely concerned and sincerely involved.

True friends have to be willing to do things for  each other.

And when true friends do things for each other it should be done from the heart or it may birth resentment.

A friend that resents you is not your real friend.

Initiative– You can’t fake initiative.

Initiative is a key indicator of genuine care and concern.

A true friend cares before you ask them to care and initiates consistent efforts toward you.

If you and another person are real friends you share the responsibility to initiation connection or communication.

If a person never calls you first, text you first, or initiates any communication with you they are not your real friend.

Time – you can’t fake time.  Time (and water) is (are) the realest substance on earth.

Time will tell you everything. Time is the absolute solute test of a friendship.

I think real friendships are the lasting ones.

Sometimes even real friends grow apart, but the realest friendships last forever.

The realest friendships are insoluble.

How do you tell a real friendship from a fake friendship?

The truth is, most times you can’t.  Friendships are subjective to each person’s vulnerability and need the opportunity to grow.

True friendship is a risk and you may have to experience a dozen counterfeits to find an authentic one.

Give each friendship its time and let that time tell you who’s real and who’s fake.